More Than Useless

I feel like, I would like
To be somewhere else doing something that matters
And I'll admit here, while I sit here
My mind wastes away and my doubts start to gather

Whats the purpose? It feels worthless
So unwanted like I've lost all my value
I can't find it, not in the least bit
and I'm just scared, so scared that I'll fail you

And sometimes I think that I'm not any good at all
And sometimes I wonder why, why I'm even here at all
But then you assure me

I'm a little more than useless
And when I think that I can't do this
You promise me that I'll get through this
And do something right
Do something right for once
~More Than Useless by Reliant

Music is one of the best things in my life. Too often this was how I used to feel, completely useless, like my life was a waste. At college I'd been doing good, having a rough day now and then but always being good overall. Last week I just couldn't shake this useless feeling. I felt like I should just drop out of college and go try to start working for Guide Dogs right now. Hearing this song reminded me that yes I'm more than useless and that when I'm feeling completely useless God is there to remind me that I can get past those feelings and do something good and meaningful with my life. So I apologize (Molly!) for not blogging for so long. I was trying to prevent this blog from having any completely negative posts. Writing is how I express myself. Even when I'm lying out loud my written words always tell the truth. I love all of you who (to my knowledge) read this blog, you are all amazing, wonderful people who are very close to me.
Random side note, Collide by Howie Day just came up on my Pandora playlist! I saw him in concert! It was amazing!

You are stronger
You are stronger
Sin is broken
You have saved me
It is written
Christ is risen
Jesus You are Lord of all
~Stronger by Hillsong

Blog I was going to write last Thursday but I got distracted/went to bed/something was about that song. This song is one of my favorite's that we sing at CRU. The original reason I liked it was that the lines "It is written Christ is risen" made me laugh because they almost rhyme and I think it's cute. But last week the meaning of the song hit me really hard. "You are stronger" That line comforted me. It's nice to know that God is out there and he is stronger than all of the evil that occurs in this world.

Awesomeness of late: People, I used to say I hate people but God has shown me that he created everyone and they are all amazing!