God is Amazing

          This last week I got lazy with God. I wasn't praying every night (like I usually do), I didn't listen to many "Jesus Tunes" and I was just not doing so hot. I was contemplating transferring schools, dropping out of school, changing my living plans for next year, I got lazy with class work/studying. Yes I was sick so my mood was depleted because of that but not talking to God hugely effected my mood. I was yet again trying to put myself in command of my life. Wednesdays are Growth group... I love growth group. Last night I really didn't want to go for a bit. There was pie at anime club! And pie is yummy! But being a "good child" I decided to eat a slice before going to class then go to growth group after class like I normally do. I like listening at growth group. We have several girls who can talk a lot (myself included). But last night I really felt like listening. I drifted a bit and due to my sick brain not functioning quite right forgot most of what was said. I remember I shared some opinions that I have and it was good. What I remember most (other than the distractions) was that Chelsea asked me to start our closing prayer. I have NEVER started, I'm still nervous when praying around others but I said "Sure!". I proceeded to thank God for letting us have the time together and thanking him for the girls in the group. At the end I asked him to make me healthy and not let anyone else on campus get my cold. Of course there were some giggles, but I've been told to ask God for what I want. We finished praying, talked for a bit and went our own separate ways.
          This morning I woke up and my cold was a million times better. This cold seemed never-ending. It kept getting worse in different ways. Some days I was exhausted, others I was coughing all day. Yesterday I was coughing and sneezing and had a seriously runny nose. Today I sneezed a few times, coughed a bit and wasn't too tired. On another note Thursdays are the days I spend the most time talking about God. I have one class then lunch with Chelsea (we have spiritual talks and spend time with God together) and then I hang out with Molly and we sometimes talk about God. Today Chelsea and I mostly talked about fun stuff and what was going on in our lives then we spent time in the word. Before reading the bible Chelsea suggested that I try to read a chapter all the way through. Before this I had been flipping through the bible and reading random bits, so she suggested I alternate between the two (read part of the chapter one time and read a random passage the next). So I started reading Matthew because I love the New Testament and that's the first one. I read a verse I had heard about in a book I read a week ago. Matthew 6:3-4 "But when you give to the needy, do not let your left hand know what your right is doing so that your giving may be secret. Then your father, who sees what is done in secret, will reward you." The quote was not complete in the book and I was kind of confused. But when I read it in the bible it made total sense. It reminds me to be humble, like Jesus! He didn't go around saying, "I'm all that and I've done all these cool things, OBEY me" Nah, he was way cooler than that... Anyways... Then I had a fun talk with Molly I went to the post office. Then I came back and met up with Molly, Meleah, Katie, and Erin. (Mac was there for a bit too). We talked about God and Jesus and all sorts of great things. The talk helped remind me to put God in control of my life, because his way really is the best.
          After that Molly, Katie and I had dinner. Then Molly and I went to CRU. CRU is always a highlight of my week. This week was even better than usual. First off the songs... I LOVE worship music. Especially the stuff we sing at CRU. I mean, our band rocks! The speaker was amazing! He talked about a passage that I've heard about many times. (this school year alone I've heard it 3+ times) But everyone tells everything in their own way and his message really hit home. He was talking about Jesus breaking social/cultural/gender/racial norms of the time. He talked about how Jesus didn't see people as "scary" or "too dangerous to save", Jesus helped everyone. At the end we sang two songs the first was Beauty of the Cross "The beauty of the cross is that there's one who has redeemed my soul. The beauty of the cross is that I'm finally free and letting go. The beauty of the cross is that your grace has found me just as I am" The chorus moved me. It reminded me (again) that I should let go of my old ways and just trust God. The last song we sang was called Hosanna. I LOVE this song. The whole song has so much meaning and I love it all! But I'll post some snippits that hit me really hard tonight. "I see a generation, rising up to take their place. With selfless faith" These lines are powerful, if a whole generation believed, the world would be changed forever! Selfless faith indicates serving others and helping them to find God. It's really powerful to me. The last bit of the song is all really good (and my favorite part).
"Heal my heart and make it clean 
Open up my eyes to the things unseen
Show me how to love like you have loved me.

Break my heart from what breaks yours
Everything I am for your kingdoms cause
As I go from nothing to 
Eternity"

Yep... AMAZING! And yet another reminder that God should be the focus/ruler of my life.

Good things of today: Bio lab! The greenhouse! Nice TA, everything detailed above XD Yep... not re-writing all of it. :)